Confident Choices: How to Choose the Best Parenting Style

Choosing the best parenting style that fits the dynamics at home can be a struggle, especially with the choices available. Here’s how parents can start.

Parenting is filled with love, affection, fun, and, for the most part, confusion.

Let’s face it. Even with years of experience, parents may never truly find perfection regarding how they should raise their children. Parenthood isn’t a one-size-fits-all. Children have different needs and require different methods of care. Likewise, parents also choose to adjust how they provide care and choose from different styles depending on how their kids behave.

The Art of Nurturing

Parents have one task to accomplish: to nurture their children. They’re responsible for ensuring these kids grow up to be adults who not only can fend for themselves but also contribute to the betterment of society. The word “nurture” sounds like an instinct. It seems like something that people naturally do, not only to themselves but also to the things around them.

However, it’s no easy job.

With so many methods to choose from and so many needs to satisfy, selecting the best parenting style is a debacle. Parents recognize the need to nurture. It is an instinct that is born once people become parents. But how they must provide it without raising conceited children is where the trouble is.

Nurturing is a balancing game.

Parents must balance their love and guidance with criticism and discipline. This is essential to ensure they aren’t molding their children to be dependent and spoiled without neglecting them or making them feel unloved. For parents to find the right in-between, they must try different approaches to see what works best.

The Four Parenting Styles

There’s no concrete answer to the query about the best parenting style. There are multiple books about parenting choices. However, none strictly establishes a definite approach that parents must uphold. This is because every child is unique, requiring parents not to use a cookie-cutter approach for children.

Researchers have identified four parenting styles for raising children of different calibers. Before discussing their differences, it’s important to remember that just because one style sounds ideal above the others, it doesn’t automatically make it the best parenting style. Parents still have to consider their children’s needs and how they would receive the approach provided.

What works best for one may not work for another. Discovering which parenting style is most effective revolves around which makes the child feel more heard and loved.

The Authoritarian Parenting

“My way or the highway.”

This is the common line from parents enforcing authoritarian parenting. As the name conveys, parents believe they have most, if not all, of the authority with this style. This might be the best parenting style for parents who want to be organized, as it focuses on obedience and discipline.

Authoritarian parenting places high expectations on children. Parents want them to religiously follow the rules set at home so that the moment they disobey, punishment is necessary. These parents prioritize stringent control, believing it’s what will raise decent and law-abiding adults.

However, children typically have little to no input in matters to achieve this.

The Permissive Parenting

Contrary to an authoritarian parent, a permissive parent sets little to no rules at home. They’re the “cool” parents who let their children do whatever makes them happy. Often, this stems from the belief that children are best taught with independence—they’ll learn what they should by themselves.

However, permissive parenting doesn’t mean nonchalance. This isn’t indifference to their children’s needs or safety. Instead, these parents practice leniency. They will only step in when a severe problem arises. This is the most appropriate parenting style for those who can be forgiving and generous. Parents with the “kids will be kids” mentality typically follow this style.

This sounds cool and, for the most part, “ideal” for parents who don’t want to suffocate their children. However, this method often raises kids who lack responsibility and are indecisive and dependent.

The Authoritative Parenting

Most believe authoritative parenting is the best of the four parenting styles. The “gold standard” of parenting balances restrictions and freedom.

These parents enforce boundaries while still allowing their kids to make decisions. This balances validating children’s feelings, desires, and curiosity while ensuring that parents still have the final say.

These parents can be lenient, but only because they consider their children’s feelings. Using positive discipline strategies, they ensure that rules are imposed without being difficult for their toddlers. This method prioritizes a warm and nurturing environment at home without compromising discipline.

The Uninvolved Parenting

Among all the parenting styles, this is what every parent should avoid. While it’s evidently hostile and out of the best parenting style debate, some parents still practice this. As the name says, an uninvolved parent neglects their child and responsibilities. They don’t bother asking or knowing anything about their child and avoid spending much time with them.

While they aren’t strict, they also don’t consider their children’s feelings. Children under this parenting style receive little guidance, nurturing, or attention. They become too independent, but this comes to a point no child should experience. Although these parents don’t intend to be this way, perhaps due to personal issues, this still shouldn’t be tolerated or given a chance.

If you’re interested in reading more about parenting styles, give this book a try!